• June 26, 2015

God’s Mercy towards me

by Katie I.

“Mercy. When I think about my journey to join the Fraternity of St. Maximilian Kolbe, I sense very per­son­ally God’s mercy toward me. I came back from my mis­sion in Ecuador three and a half years ago and, to be honest, have strug­gled quite a bit with the ques­tion of how to con­tinue living out the Heart’s Home charism in the United States, espe­cially apart from my com­mu­nity, a daily apos­to­late, and the rich prayer life of a mis­sion. I never lost faith in the fact that it was pos­sible to live out com­pas­sion in a new sit­u­a­tion. I just didn’t have con­fi­dence in myself that I was truly “living out Heart’s Home,” what­ever I thought that meant.

And, though it might seem back­wards, I also resisted joining the Frat for a while. After trying to live out the Heart’s Home charism in my new mis­sion as a Master of Divinity stu­dent at Notre Dame, I became per­haps too aware of my lim­i­ta­tions and my many fail­ures. I felt like most of the prophets of his­tory who, when God called them, said, “That’s nice and all, but you don’t really want me.” It took a lot of time for God to con­vince me, through prayer and many con­ver­sa­tions with friends and family, of what should have been obvious to me. Just as it would be silly for me to say, “I am cold, so I should warm myself before I go sit next to the fire,” it was silly for me to think that joining the Frat was about proving myself worthy, or even about me at all. In fact, the Frat Max is an incred­ible gift that is teaching me, along with my brothers and sis­ters in the Fraternity, how to die to myself from a place of love, to be a “martyr of charity” like St. Maximilian Kolbe who gave his life for another man at Auschwitz. After my mis­sion, joining the Frat Max is like entering into the kinder­garten of love all over again, and as a grad stu­dent who often gets car­ried away by my mind, I am so grateful for this family that teaches me how to live from my heart.”

Our Lady of Compassion, pray for us.
St. Maximilian Kolbe, pray for us.

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